Training resilience through RELATIONAL INTELLIGENCE involves investigating the different ways that we relate to our work, our colleagues, and ourselves – and how these ways of relating impact our sense of connection.

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When stress levels rise, it’s incredibly easy to fall back onto well worn patterns of being hard on ourselves. Self-criticism is a deeply engrained mental habit that causes a tremendous amount of difficulty in our lives - especially at work. Our inner critic influences every domain of our lives and yet we often don’t even see how this undercurrent of criticism can color our entire life experience. The tendency to put ourselves down and the subsequent feeling of deficiency impacts our ability to feel relaxed and connected with others, to be creative and take risks on projects, and to find a sense of fulfillment.

 

Self-compassion is a powerful antidote. We start by bringing mindful awareness to how we're relating – when we make a mistake, are we harsh or gentle? Critical or kind? Blaming or understanding? Rather than trying to motivate ourselves with criticism or ignore our feelings, compassionately pausing gives us space to fully acknowledge our own struggles, see our circumstances from a broader perspective, offer ourselves kindness, and then take wise action. With consistent practice, we gradually transform our inner-critic into an inner-ally that provides a source of nourishment and connection to ourselves and all those around us.